By Lynna Clark
Did you hear about the incident at the East Rowan Library? It was all about me. Yeah… apparently I am a big deal. My friend Brittney who works there invited me to speak about my vast experience in writing. The media got wind of it. A crowd gathered. Authorities were called. As we approached the venue with great anticipation, emergency lights flashed in the distance. David pulled our vehicle to the right side of the road so they could lead us through the mob. Evidently Rockwell paparazzi can get pretty rowdy. I guess I need to get used to it. The life of a famous writer can be rather intense.
Did I mention that I write fiction?
So what really happened was…
A few friends shared the event on Facebook. As we traveled toward Rockwell the person in front of us drove at the rate of 25 mph the entire way. But that’s perfectly understandable since he was busy texting. The joy I’d claimed earlier in the day turned to a fervent, heartfelt prayer.
“Lord Jesus, please help me not cuss…”
Apparently someone keeled over at one of the fast food joints and needed emergency personnel. As lights flashed in our direction we pulled to the right. Though I encouraged my beloved to pass the dude in front of us as soon as the ambulance cleared, he is not that guy. David does not bend the rules of the highway. The man is so righteous that he slams on breaks for caution lights. It’s a wonder our marriage has lasted so long.
Texting dude slowly made his way back onto the road, making the star of the show late. Well, not actually late. I guess I should say later than I wanted to be. David always leaves early enough to account for such aggravation.
When finally we got there, the place was packed! We had to park across the way in the gravel lot by the dentist. There were at least thirteen people there… if you count me and David… and the two librarians who hosted… plus my best friend and her husband… and the two who walked out during my riveting presentation.
Dang Millennials. Hey… old people know stuff!
Annyyywayyy… a good time was had by all. I got to meet Michael, who I called Matthew several times. I met Judy and Brenda and Brooke the hugger. My friend Vickie stopped by even though she had groceries in the car. Randall asked good questions which sounded pre-planned, except that I didn’t have answers. But I will next time.
Did I say next time? What I meant was… if I can work another event into my very busy schedule. I’m kind of a big deal.
Someday I’m going to invent a sarcasm font. Folks with my warped sense of humor would certainly benefit.
PS:
The next big event is this Saturday in Lexington, NC. Missions Pottery and More is hosting my new book release from 9am – 4pm. I’ll bring copies of all my books. No pre-order necessary. I’d love to meet you!
