By Doug Creamer
Being Present is your Present
We are now in the heart of the holiday season. We have consumed the big Thanksgiving meal and our taste buds are excited about the coming spread of food for Christmas and New Year’s. There will be cakes, pies, and cookies calling our names. There will be parties and family gatherings that will bring more delectable treats our way. It’s the season of eating!
Thanksgiving begins the season of great food. My taste buds were delighted with my choices this year. I had to pick and choose what I ate at my brother’s because there was more to taste than the crowd that gathered could eat. I am not sure how many people made it to my brother’s house for Thanksgiving but it was quite a crowd and quite a feast.
The crowd included my family and extended family. There were some guests but we make them feel like family. Who wouldn’t want to be at a place filled with love, laughter, and great food? There were many conversations occurring inside and outside the house. Our family is close-knit but everyone is welcome to join.
I was glad to see and hug my mom…but felt a little pang at the thought that Dad wasn’t there. I enjoyed catching up with my brother and sister. We’ve been together a little more this year and I am thankful for that. I always enjoy chatting with my nieces and nephews. There were some that didn’t make it this year, but I enjoyed talking with those that did. They are young and their lives are full working and raising their families. I always want to hear the latest from each household. My side of the family is now up to sixteen grandnieces and grandnephews with one more on the way. It’s hard to keep up.
There are more holiday gatherings scheduled for my family on both sides and I look forward to each one. While there will be plenty of good food consumed at these gatherings, I look forward to spending some quality time with my family. That’s what is great about the holidays, we get the chance to unplug from the routines and reconnect with those we love. It’s hard to connect when we all lead such busy lives.
I have been wondering; how do we slow life down so we can truly reconnect? There are so many demands placed on our lives, with endless expectations to be here and go there, how do we quiet our minds enough to be present in any situation? Our minds race almost as fast as our schedules, thinking about the next thing we have to do and missing the thing we are doing at the moment. At the end of the holiday season we are so frazzled that we welcome the routines of daily life with open arms.
I don’t want the holidays to be that way. I think the best way to begin the process is by learning to say no. No, I can’t make it to that event or gathering. We have to give ourselves permission to say no. Then we have to keep ourselves from feeling guilty. It’s okay to not attend everything that is available to you. By saying no to some things it allows you to say yes to what’s important to you. It also allows you to be present at the things you have chosen. You can breathe. You can take in the event and the people and really connect.
Being present at the things you have chosen can be one of the best presents to others and to yourself. The gift of you! Not a frazzled you who is thinking about all that has yet to get done, but the you that those who gathered came to see. Don’t allow yourself to be over-booked, rather, choose to be under-booked. Allow for some uncommitted down time. This will help you to be present each time you gather at the events and places you have chosen to enjoy.
I want to encourage you to give your family and friends the best present you can give, you! Be present because you have chosen to be present. Focus your mind on the people you are with and enjoy their company. Let the joy of this season rise up in your spirit because you have chosen the places you are going this year. Let your love for your family and friends shine through you because you have chosen to be present. Let’s enjoy the food, family, and friends this season and be present, filled with the love, peace, and joy of the holiday season.
Contact Doug Creamer at PO Box 777, Faith, NC 28041or doug@dougcreamer.com
