By Doug Creamer

Since I retired I have attended many funerals. Friends and several church members have gone home to be with the Lord. Being retired gives me the opportunity to be there for my friends and family during their time of need. I never know what to say to the family other than I am sorry for their loss. 

I went to a funeral this week for my Sunday school teacher’s husband. I have been to their home several times as they hosted Christmas parties for our class. He always made me feel so welcome to their home. He served in many different diplomatic positions for our government here at home and abroad. He and his wife have served and traveled to many nations around the world.

His experience gave him a great understanding of politics. He personally knew many politicians, and served in multiple administrations including President Ford’s administration. He had insights about where our country is and where we are going. I enjoyed the opportunities to talk with him and get his perspective on current events, issues, and politics. He was a man who had great insight into how our country works and I know he will be greatly missed.  

I think funerals can be very insightful. I love to hear the speakers as they share stories and reflect on the individual being honored. It’s okay to laugh at a funeral if someone shares a humorous story. It’s good to share the pain of the family as they deal with the loss of their loved one. Today my heart was moved by the passionate singing of an old friend who has the voice of an angel.

It’s hard to understand the impact your presence brings at funerals for the family who is struggling with their loss. While I am a writer and I work with words all the time, I struggle to find the right words of comfort to offer families who have lost loved ones. I have come to understand that words are not necessary, it’s the love and support we bring that makes all the difference. I am always glad that I went to the funeral so the family knows my heart is with them. Someday we are all going to find ourselves standing in their place and we will be glad when others show up for us.

When it comes down to it, it’s not just funerals when we find ourselves in need of people’s love and support. We might be struggling with depression, anxiety, health issues, loss of a job, or some other difficult situations where we need our brothers and sisters in Christ to stand with us. God did not intend for us to make our life’s journey alone. We were created to be together, to come together, to stand together, and sometimes to sit and cry together as we experience the challenges life brings our way.

I like praying alone and with others. When we pray, we hope God will intervene in our situation and keep us from having to walk through the trials and challenges of life. I have witnessed firsthand how God can heal and deliver someone. What a great celebration that brings when we see God’s miraculous hand at work in our lives.

But what happens when God doesn’t move, doesn’t heal, or doesn’t deliver us? We are forced to go THROUGH the challenge. We don’t want to go through, we want to be delivered. Sometimes when we go through we learn so much about God and His incredible love for us. It also reveals the depth of love and support from our spiritual families, which means so much.

That’s what being there is all about. I need you during my challenging times to be there encouraging and challenging me to press on, to keep going, to not give up, to believe God’s promises are for me, and to trust Him when I can’t feel or see Him. Your presence with me can give me the courage to take the next step, to keep moving forward when I want to give up.

I want to encourage you to be there for the people in your life when they are facing difficult and challenging times. I need you and you need me to be there for each other. Your experiences with God can help others who are facing the same challenges you have lived through. Be there. Share your story of hope. Pray and encourage those in need. Let’s take each other’s hand and be there to help each other through life’s challenges. We are not alone and we will get through this thing together.  Contact Doug Creamer at PO Box 777, Faith, NC 28041or doug@dougcreamer.com