Author Archives: dcreamer

By Doug Creamer

Memories

            Many years ago when I was a young teenager, my sister worked as a lifeguard for the National Park Service near Nags Head. I think she did it for a couple of summers. My family would rent a cottage in Nags Head for a week and we would spend time on the beach with my sister as our lifeguard. It was a great week and we had some great family time together.

            My sister was living in a trailer provided for the workers in the National Park Service. One time she invited me to come down and stay with her while her roommate was away. I couldn’t believe my luck. My sister made it a very special time together. I was staying at the beach, who could ask for anything more?

            One night my sister said we were going to get up in the middle of the night and go outside to watch a meteor shower. I thought she was crazy. But she woke me up and we went out and lay on the picnic table and watched the sky. The first thing that caught my attention was how many stars were visible. I don’t remember ever having seen that many stars before. We could also see the Milky Way, which was incredible.

            We talked, watched the sky, and saw many meteors that night. There was one I will never forget, right over our heads. It was a brilliant, bright meteor. We looked up about thirty seconds later and could still see the smoke floating in the sky. We have talked about that night watching the meteors many times over the years.

            There are several times a year that we will get meteor showers. I will almost always go out and see how many shooting stars I can see. I have seen some great shows over the years, but nothing compares to that night with my sister.

            I went out several evenings over the past week to watch for a meteor shower. It’s quiet in my neighborhood late at night. The peacefulness snuggled into my soul. I watched the night sky hoping to catch a glimpse of a shooting star, and I wasn’t disappointed.

            What I found on my trips outside was not the excitement of catching a shooting star but the satisfaction of finding a few quiet moments. I made myself slow down and take some deep breaths. It’s been a bit crazy lately trying to do life, deal with a few minor health issues, and trying to navigate my emotions over the loss of my father. In the stillness I sighed a few quiet prayers and talked with my Heavenly Father.

            It’s hard to find peace in some moments of life. Revisiting great memories with my sister helped. There have been times of insomnia in recent weeks and I find myself revisiting other memories with my family. Some of the stories I wrote about in last week’s column, others are more for our family. I have tried to remember good times spent together and moments of laughter and cheer. The memories bring a sense of comfort, familiarity, and peace…like a warm blanket on a cold winter’s night.

            Some friends have reached out and offered comfort and words of encouragement, which have been much appreciated. Some have shared their path through this process. While it is comforting and helpful to hear the stories, I am learning a new lesson. I think that this path is one that I must create on my own. I must sort through the memories and learn to cherish the good ones and forgive for those that aren’t so good. I have to learn to let go of the pain and find the peace and comfort that only my Heavenly Father can bring. These are not easy lessons and I am figuring out that this process is going to take some time.

            I want to encourage you if you find yourself on a similar path as me to open the boxes of memories, sort them, discard those that are filled with pain, and cherish the ones that bring joy. It’s good to review the good ones, like watching reruns of your favorite TV shows. Give the bad ones to Jesus and ask Him for peace in return. Allow the Holy Spirit to do His job as the comforter. Spend some time with your Father talking things through and allow Him to lead you down the path. Trust Him because He knows the way. He is the Way, the Truth, and He offers you the Life filled with His presence and peace.

Contact Doug Creamer at PO Box 777, Faith, NC 28041or doug@dougcreamer.com

By Doug Creamer

Dad Creamer

            The last two weeks have been quite long. Two weeks ago on a Monday evening my brother called to tell me that my Dad had had two strokes and things were not looking good. The hospital spent several days running extensive tests on him, which provided evidence that he was not going to recover. It was decided mid-week to move him to hospice care, and he passed on last Monday.

            My dad was always very athletic. He played baseball and basketball when he was in high school. He played tennis, racquetball, and golf in his adult life. He enjoyed running, walking, and riding his bike. He also enjoyed watching sports on TV. He was an avid Red Sox fan. My brother and I took him to Atlanta to see the Red Sox play the Braves, a memory I will treasure.  By far, my Dad’s favorite sport to watch was golf.

            When I was a kid we had a professional golf tournament come to the course that was in our backyard. Dad was a Marshall and my brother and I set up a soda stand. One exciting moment from the tournament came when one of the golfers hit his ball along the edge of the woods and my black cat ran out and lay on his ball. We panicked, but the golfer was good natured and picked up our cat and petted it.

            My favorite memory of golf is when the country club was having a father/son tournament. Dad had to play twice. He and my brother were in the running to win a trophy but they came up a little short. My Dad and I were surprised when we won a second place trophy. I remind my brother about it as often as possible.

            One of my Dad’s favorite golfing memories came when I was a kid. We would often go out after dinner and look for golf balls. Then we would chip and putt around the greens. One evening a neighbor was walking with us and I wanted to show them how good I could hit the ball. They were engrossed in a conversation and not paying attention. I finally got their attention and gave it my biggest swing. I twirled around twice and fell on my bottom. The two of them laughed so hard, but they did try to comfort me. I can now look back and laugh.

            Professionally, my Dad climbed the corporate ladder. I used to tease him that he would mail new resumes out on the first day of his new job. At one point he was a vice-president of a car company, at another point he franchised a pizza chain – Milton’s Pizza. No pizza could compare. My Dad worked into his 80’s, even being an Uber driver. He was a man of integrity on his job and I admired him for it.

            If you ever met my Dad you know he liked to talk about politics. He liked to find out where you stood on an issue and he would always take the opposing view. I asked him once why he would argue with someone who held his point of view. He said that he would attack the weaknesses in what he believed and see how the person defended their position. He said he could learn a lot on how to build a stronger position.

            My Dad always liked to meet new people from different places. He treated everyone with dignity and respect. He enjoyed learning about them and their culture. He taught me that everyone should be treated equally. It didn’t matter what gender, race, national origin, religion, or any other difference there might be between us, we should treat people with kindness and listen to what they think. My Dad hired Iranian college students in the early 80’s when no one else would give them a chance. He invited people of different ethnic backgrounds into our home at a time when society was more segregated. I learned a lot about how to treat people fairly from my Dad.  

            My Dad really enjoyed the lessons of a university professor who taught Sunday school classes for a few churches in Greensboro. He would find out where she was teaching and show up for Sunday school. She said he would ask questions in class and often emailed additional questions to her through the week. She told me that she will miss him walking her to her car after class. She will be speaking at his Memorial Service. My Dad’s curiosity, questioning, and debating invaded all areas of his life. I hope I will carry on his curiosity for life, his kindness and respect for others, and his work ethic in all that I do. He will be missed.

Contact Doug Creamer at PO Box 777, Faith, NC 28041or doug@dougcreamer.com